Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Re: Thanks, Buddy....

So, there I was....

Sitting at my computer after work last Friday, minding my own business, when I heard Judy come down to the basement to get something for supper out of the freezer. Nothing unusual. I heard her open the freezer door and move some things around then shut it. "Where'd this black Colnago come from"?

Crap!

I said "Say what? I don't have a black Colnago".

"It's gold and black. Where'd it come from?" she asked.

I got up from my chair at the 'puter and walked out to the other room. She was standing there looking at the bike with a twinkle in her eyes. Busted!

I heard someone come in the back door. It was Jackal and Moo with The Queen of Cross. They were quiet. LOL.

I said "It's been here since October (oops, I meant to say January. October just slipped out. No going back now). Didn't you see the frame sitting on top of the table saw"? Trying to think fast I said "I bought that frameset a long time ago. It was sitting on top of the table saw for months".

She said "Don't think that you can sneak around and buy a frame and get away with it. It's a bike now and I said no more bikes".

Holding a frozen pizza, she starts looking around and counting out loud. "One, two, three...." "I know you had the red one. You've had it forever".

"Yup, since 1985", I said.

"And that white one..."

"I bought that one in 1986 thinking Jackal would ride it".

I was starting to sweat....

"Where'd that one come from"?

"Judy.... you went with me to Chicago to pick it up a couple of years ago".

"OK", she says, "Where'd that black one come from"?

"That's the Surly Adam rides" was my reply.

"I know you bought that yellow one up in Minnesota".

I said "yes, in 2005". "I bought the green Surly from Brent in '06. You were with me when I ordered the parts to build it." (That comment didn't appease her...)

"How many Colnagos do you have"?

"Four"

"There are 9 bikes in this basement"

"OK". Crap.

I mentioned that "One of them is yours, Dear".

"I know. One of them. One. Just one".

Jackal and Moo were listening, wondering what they'd walked into....

"Why do you need so damned many bikes"? "You don't need all these bikes...."

Pointing at the blue Master X Light on the trainer she says "How long have you had that one"?

"4 or 5 years, Dear"

"OK, I know I've seen it before".

By now she was walking up the steps. Jackal was standing in the kitchen and she says to him "He bought another bike. There's another Colnago in the basement".

"Huh?" "The one he bought in October"? "That was a frame he built up". (a perfect blend of ignorance and innocense)

He headed to the basement to check it out..... (You would have had to see it with your own eyes.)

I could hear her upstairs talking to Amy and telling Jackal "9 bikes. He has 9 bikes in the basement. Why the hell does he need 9 bikes?"

Anyway, that's the story of Friday night. It was all Jackal could do to keep from busting up and laughing out loud. Why is it so funny when I get busted?

I was taking a shower Saturday morning and broke out laughing when I thought about it. I guess you would have had to have been there but, well, it was funny as hell at the time.

That's it for now. Have a great day!

Ride safe.

Peace out, yo!

13 Comments:

Blogger Guitar Ted said...

Ah! "The Rest Of The Story", as it were. Good stuff! I'm still laughing about the "since October" thing, but now it is even funnier.

7:49 AM  
Blogger Travel Gravel said...

Blue, If it would help your sitch, you could have her call me and I could walk her through my excuses for having 40 + bikes, but please don't! My dear wife doesn't even realize that it could be another source of irritation;) My one break in life. Later!(and best of luck!) Gravelo

9:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now you need a tandem, just so you two could ride together! hehehehe

Lily

5:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This post is an all-to-familiar conversation in our household. If only we wives didn't know so much about the stinkin' bikes in the first place we wouldn't realize that it is a different than the 12 others you've owned in the last couple of years. I feel HER pain.

3:50 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Wow. I just had a head rush on that one. I had that same exact conversation with Rene just recently. When I picked up the "red" Sinister. She noticed my MTB wasn't black anymore and asked "where did that red bike come from". Even my answers were the similar: "I have had that for a long time, honey. Don't you remember?" :^)
Damn funny stuff. 9 bikes, huh? Well, you do have me beat!

4:04 PM  
Blogger bluecolnago said...

g-ted....
yup, that's the rest of the story. the october thing just slipped out. it was kinda funny....

greg....
thanks for the offer but i don't want to cause you any greif. hows the arm doing?

lily....
no tandems for me. those things scare me! you should see fat albert behind tony on a tandem. omg!

haley....
you nailed it. i'll let judy know that you feel her pain. thanks for stopping by.

oldman....
someday we'll look back on these "episodes" as harmless adventures, eh?

5:48 PM  
Blogger john said...

I have at least nine bike that I keep operational - and many more in boxes and baskets... and I haven't let jenny in the basement for 14 years.
John

9:13 PM  
Blogger Adam Lorenz said...

Classic... but there's always room for one more!

One benefit to being single... I went from 10 bikes this time last year, to 4 bike by the middle of summer, and now I'm even with you at 9... and I've got a few others in mind.

What brakes are you rocking on the new one?

10:33 PM  
Blogger bluecolnago said...

john....
the way i see it is that we could be doing a lot worse things than collecting bicycles. you don't let jenny go down in the basement? judy would throw me down the stairs!

a.lo....
you'll probably have an even dozen by the end of the year.
the brakes are frogglegs cantilevers. they're nice, light, stop you great, and not terribly expensive. great bang for the buck!

9:51 PM

9:53 PM  
Blogger MrDaveyGie said...

Now that was funny. I know the scenario. If fact in honor of all my bikes in the garage, I am planning this year to ride a century on each of em, dirt or pavement dependant on the bike.
Happy rides.
Dave

8:27 PM  
Blogger Craig, The Flanders Fat Cat said...

Here I am!

That was damn funny. My bikes are always around for a while before my wife finds them. I always bring out that same line about having had it forever, "don't you remember?". I try to buy all my bikes in blue, since it seems to be the new color that women recognize.

12:03 PM  
Blogger Craig, The Flanders Fat Cat said...

The change in color, that is.

12:04 PM  
Blogger bluecolnago said...

dave....
good luck with those century rides!

craig....
i like the consistant color idea. i may have to try that. i said something to judy about a set of wheels yesterday and she about came unglued. accusing me of trying a different approach to sneaking a new bike in the house. i don't have room!

9:43 PM  

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